Editorial note: Spoilers ahead for “Dying for Sex.”
In “Dying for Sex,” the new FX show based on Nikki Boyer’s hit podcast about her friend Molly’s sexual exploration in the face of a terminal cancer diagnosis, juxtaposition is key. Hilarity and poignancy are found in the proximity of cock cages and canes, kicking dicks and broken bones, piss play and chemo. The same is true for the show’s tragic yet joyful Hanukkah scene — albeit, it’s less kinky.
In episode six, “Happy Holidays,” Nikki’s (Jenny Slate) life has completely blown up in the face of Molly’s (Michelle Williams) wish to die in her best friend’s care. She’s lost her job, instigated a break up with a boyfriend whom she really loves and, in a realer sense, lives with, and is now sleeping on Molly’s couch. At the same time, Molly has just passed her one year terminal diagnosis-iversary and is both continuing to physically deteriorate as well as finally reckon with the sexual abuse she endured as a child. All just in time for the winter holidays! But no matter, Molly is still in pursuit of reaching orgasmic climax with another person, which sometimes involves kicking Nikki out of the apartment so she can hook up with her neighbor. And so, this is how Nikki and her sister find themselves celebrating Hanukkah in the hallway of Molly’s building.
Gelt wrappers are strewn across the tiled floor, Nikki looks gaunt in her dreidel sweater and the menorah looks tiny compared to the scale of the bleak hallway. “You are a mess. You don’t even have a bed. Look at us, please,” Nikki’s sister tells her. “We’re right next to the elevator and we’re having Hanukkah in a hallway.”
She adds, “I just thought you were going to take her to some doctor’s appointments.”
“How do I explain this to you?” Nikki grasps for any semblance of an argument and finds the hem of her shirt. “This! This is some of her blood on my shirt. I don’t even know when it’s from. I have her blood on like half of my shirts at this point, it’s like how I look, OK? And when I see this, what I think is I’m going to be happy that it’s here. I’m going to be happy that this stain is here when I don’t have her anymore.”
The sisters let the heaviness envelope them for a moment. And then they turn back to the holiday. “Hey, you know what, we forgot the most important part,” Nikki’s sister reminds her. Smiling, the two break out into a raucous rendition of “Hanukkah, O Hanukkah,” loudly clapping as Nikki gets to her feet and starts jumping around.
Hanukkah dreidel sweaters over blood-stained t-shirts. The bright menorah sitting on the dirty apartment building floor. This scene is the perfect encapsulation of “Dying for Sex” and a deeply authentic representation of Jewish holidays. On Hanukkah, Jews celebrate another moment in our history where our culture was almost destroyed with fried food and spinning tops. Nikki and her sister seemingly take a cue from their Jewish ancestors by deciding to celebrate the Festival of Lights in spite of the tragedy of Nikki and Molly’s lives, making the holiday happen even when it has to happen in a hallway.
Intriguingly, in real life, Nikki Boyer isn’t actually Jewish. However, Molly Kochan was. In her posthumously published memoir “Screw Cancer,” Molly writes about her childhood fascination with Orthodox Judaism, her experience with Jewish day schools and eventually losing faith in God. So why does the show make Nikki Jewish and seemingly not Molly? That much is unclear. although, let’s be real, seeing Michelle Williams dance around to “Hanukkah, O Hanukkah” would not hit as hard as seeing the iconic Jenny Slate do it.
“Dying for Sex” is now streaming on Hulu.
