Last Friday morning, a D.C. councilman named Trayon White Sr. posted a video on Facebook where he accused “the Rothschilds” of controlling the weather. He said, as JTA reported, “Man, it just started snowing out of nowhere this morning, man. Y’all better pay attention to this climate control, man, this climate manipulation. And D.C. keep talking about, ‘We a resilient city.’ And that’s a model based off the Rothschilds controlling the climate to create natural disasters they can pay for to own the cities, man. Be careful.”
He later apologized, saying “I did not intend to be anti-Semitic, and I see I should not have said that after learning from my colleagues.”
However, Jewish twitter ran with this anti-Semitic conspiracy theory and turned it into many wonderful jokes. We’ve rounded up some of our favorites.
1. Jewish mothers and winter
If Jews controlled the weather there would be no Winter, so Jewish mothers wouldn’t fret about their kids wearing their hats, mittens &scarves. The existence of both Winter AND Jewish mothers shows that, alas, the former is more in control of the latter than the other way 'round.
— Wendy Shalit (@wendyshalit) March 20, 2018
2. We just can’t agree
Anyhow, the real reason Jews don't control the weather is that Soros and Adelson can never agree on what temperature to set the thermostat.
— (((Yair Rosenberg))) (@Yair_Rosenberg) March 19, 2018
3. Like, genuinely can’t agree
If Jews controlled the weather there would be no weather because we’d spend the whole year arguing about how warm it should be.
— Jonathan M. Katz✍🏻 (@KatzOnEarth) March 19, 2018
4. Don’t you think we would make sure it never rained on visiting day?
If Jews controlled the weather, don’t you think we would make sure the weather was consistently sunny and warm for Christmas vacation in Boca OR not too hot / humid (or rainy) on camp visiting day? Don’t you think we’d remove the humidity so we’d all have better hair days?
— carol getz abolafia (@carolabo) March 20, 2018
5. New York weather would be better
Let’s be serious, people: if Jews controlled the weather, it would be a lot nicer out in NY.
— Megan Liberman (@meganliberman) March 19, 2018
6. And no humidity, ever
Dude if Jews controlled the weather why would we EVER make it humid, that’s DEATH for our hair.
— Jenny Jaffe (@jennyjaffe) March 19, 2018
7. No! More! Shvitzing!
If Jews controlled the weather it would always be cold so our mothers could tell us to wear a jacket, and we’d never complain about shvitzing.
— Tyler Gildin (@TylerGildin) March 20, 2018
8. The new name for the conspiracy
The Thermostats of the Elders of Zion. https://t.co/Y3YIGVpRlF
— (((New York actor))) (@JoshMalina) March 19, 2018
9. Everywhere would be Florida
Insanity of this conspiracy theory aside, I am genuinely confused about the alleged motive here for making it snow. If Jews controlled the weather I’m pretty sure most places would feel like Florida https://t.co/XKPUCp8oC0
— Emma Silvers (@emmaruthless) March 19, 2018
10. Or more specifically: Palm Springs
If Jews controlled the weather it would be like Palm Springs (CA) every day and we’d walk around saying “it’s a dry heat!”
— Dan Levitan (@DanLevitan) March 19, 2018
11. At least it wasn’t the Morgansterns…
@mcmoynihan am just glad it was the Rothschilds and not the Morgansterns, who always had the thermostat way too low
— Jake Tapper (@jaketapper) March 20, 2018
12. The existence of drafts
Lol if Jews control the weather then how come my Bubbe is always saying it’s too drafty https://t.co/cInxlxHN0R
— Ike Barinholtz (@ikebarinholtz) March 19, 2018
13. At least we can solve climate change?
The good news: paying off the Rothschild family to stop climate change has got to be easier than shifting the whole global energy system.
— Walter Russell Mead (@wrmead) March 19, 2018
14. Hebrew school was a waste
Shit I can't believe in all my years in Jewish education I never once learned how to control the weather https://t.co/QrlsCwynOE
— Amy Spiro (@AmySpiro) March 19, 2018
15. It’s exciting!
I told my kids about Jews controlling the weather and they are PSYCHED.
— Emily Nussbaum (@emilynussbaum) March 20, 2018
16. But like, duh, there’s a new family now
This is nonsense. The Rothschilds haven't manned the weather machine in at least 4 decades. https://t.co/vOYgBzVcqE
— The Mossad (@TheMossadIL) March 19, 2018
17. And *if* the conspiracy was true, why would Florida retirement communities exist?
If Jews controlled the weather, no one would be leaving Long Island to move to West Palm Beach.
— mitrebox (@mitrebox) March 20, 2018
18. Choice of weather
As a Jew, I’m making tomorrow’s weather cloudy with a chance of matzah balls.
— Hilary Luros (@hilaryluros) March 20, 2018
19. See you there!
For those asking: the committee to rig the weather to mess over the enemies of the Jews meets tomorrow https://t.co/ltB1yRM7Tn
— (((Yair Rosenberg))) (@Yair_Rosenberg) March 19, 2018
20. (Also, we control everything.)
A D.C. Councilman claims that Jews control the weather, which is true, along with show business, the banks and everything else except why your sister still isn't married, even though she's such a pretty girl
— Paul Rudnick (@PaulRudnickNY) March 19, 2018
21. Life lessons at bar mitzvahs
Why am I just learning now that Jews control the weather?? Shouldn’t someone have mentioned that at my Bar Mitzvah? ‘Congratulations on becoming a man. Also, you can make it rain now’.
— sohmer (@sohmer) March 19, 2018
22. And we could have bangs
If Jews controlled the weather there would be zero humidity so I could finally have bangs.
— Annika H Rothstein (@truthandfiction) March 19, 2018
23. All the hair jokes
Like, how would that even work? Also do you think so many Jewish girls would have frizzy hair if we controlled the weather like think this thru for one second https://t.co/kvXJCgvMYh
— Batya Ungar-Sargon (@bungarsargon) March 19, 2018
24. Sleet negotiations
I actually did negotiate a small back-end on sleet. https://t.co/YZ9ywlNjAU
— Steven Weber (@TheStevenWeber) March 19, 2018
25. And wintry mix credit
So excited I can finally take credit for “wintry mix.” Whenever the forecast says wintry mix, that’s all me https://t.co/XPe380iMf0
— Jess Dweck (@TheDweck) March 19, 2018
26. Can the Rothschilds stop this snow storm headed our way?
6-10 inches of snow en route to NYC tomorrow. Rothschilds and Bilderberg Group aren't playing around.
— Justin Brannan (@JustinBrannan) March 20, 2018
27. Last, a mood:
Me when someone suggests that Jews control the weather. pic.twitter.com/OV1aJ6wS0W
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) March 19, 2018
