If you hadn’t heard, Adam Levine and the rest of Maroon 5 performed at the halftime show of Super Bowl LIII.
It was a boring Super Bowl (that’s just what I heard, I didn’t watch, I watched Russian Doll instead), and it seemed no one was exactly excited by the prospect of Maroon 5 performing.
Think this Super Bowl is boring? Well don’t worry, it’ll surely ramp up with halftime show by MAROON 5!!!
— Sam Richardson (@SamRichardson) February 4, 2019
After all was said and done, the general consensus of the performance was: not great. Levine, 39, was the target of most of the ire online. Because, well, can you name another member of Maroon 5? (I can’t, and I wrote this story!) People had many, many thoughts about his outfit of choice, his tattoos of choice, and just, well, everything.
Let’s take a look at the best jokes about Levine:
1. The Jewish people no longer claim him:
The Jewish people no longer claim Adam Levine
— Jake Woolf (@jakewoolf) February 4, 2019
2. His shirt looked like a target pillow:
Although auto tune failed Adam Levine terribly, Target Home Collection really came through with his wardrobe. pic.twitter.com/JzMrJYRGSl
— Jessie (@CourtJesster83) February 4, 2019
3. It truly was the ugliest shirt in America:
(Click on this image, we promise you won’t regret it.)
here's the script for the movie I wrote about how adam levine chose his superbowl outfit pic.twitter.com/6ALcSYFQQS
— Mitra Jouhari (@tweetrajouhari) February 4, 2019
4. Jewish mothers panicking everywhere:
Adam Levine is covered with tattoos and took his shirt off outside in February.
Somewhere there is a very unhappy Jewish mother.
— Dave Pell (@davepell) February 4, 2019
5. And so are Jewish grandfathers:
(Although let’s be clear, that whole Jews-with-tattoos-can’t-be-buried-in-a-Jewish-cemetery thing is a myth!)
OLD JEWISH GUY: You know, this Adam Levine yutz can't be buried in a Jewish cemetery.
— Jeremy Newberger (@jeremynewberger) February 4, 2019
6. Really, just Jewish parents in general:
[thousands of Jewish adolescent boys now promising their mothers they will never get tattoos like Adam Levine]
— Sam Raskin (@samraskinz) February 4, 2019
7. Memento jokes!
Adam Levine looks like Memento if all he has to know about himself is that he’s a douche. pic.twitter.com/hXrKAydtpX
— The Volatile Mermaid (@OhNoSheTwitnt) February 4, 2019
8. Doodle Bear jokes!
— Stanzi 🔮 (@stanzipotenza) February 4, 2019
9. Chipotle jokes!
The only take-away from this year’s Super Bowl is the striking resemblance between Adam Levine and Chipotle bags pic.twitter.com/BOQAZYAgaL
— Bailey Hunter (@Bailey_Hunter24) February 4, 2019
10. Political jokes!
This is the Howard Schultz of halftime shows
— Dan Pfeiffer (@danpfeiffer) February 4, 2019
11. What is up with the California tattoo?
That stomach tat is for Adam Levine if gets lost and doesn’t know where he lives pic.twitter.com/PWuDhe5sSe
— haunted idiot governor (@zandywithaz) February 4, 2019
12. Why does he look like a Russian mobster?
How come Adam Levine dressed like a Russian mobster for the halftime show? pic.twitter.com/6Qjd4ixcPb
— LaRae Boaldin (@laraeboaldin7) February 4, 2019
13. But maybe it motivated some to go to the gym…
“Adam Levine has some nerve!” he tweeted as he set his alarm for the gym, made a protein shake and hired a trainer.
— billy eichner (@billyeichner) February 4, 2019
14. “Manifest the energy of that dude you hook up with every year for Thanksgiving.”
Adam Levine, who has managed to manifest the energy of that dude you hook up with every year when you go home for Thanksgiving but whose friend request you will not accept, did a sexy lil strip show and revealed his very complicated Prison Break tattoos.https://t.co/k640I9cYia
— R. Eric Thomas (@oureric) February 4, 2019
now I have to explain to my children that adam levine has nipples
— ziwe (@ziwe) February 4, 2019
16. Seriously, what is up with the tattoos?
Adam Levine’s tattoos look like they were all chosen and placed by an algorithm
— Amanda Mull (@amandamull) February 4, 2019
17. But let’s remember…
I’m sorry but Adam Levine should get the same grief as Janet did for showing us his unclothed nipples; more specifically, this should prove how absurd, hypocritical, racist and sexist that puritanical hysteria over Janet’s boob really was.
— Reappropriate (@reappropriate) February 4, 2019